It is not what you do for your children, but what you have taught them to do for themselves that will make them successful human beings.”

Ann Landers

Chores – We grew up despising that word. And now our kids do? However, as Pediatric Occupational Therapists (OTs) who support children with their functional and meaningful daily tasks, we know the benefits of chores are numerous. From sensory input to sequencing – developmentally appropriate chores have it all.

This blog post will list out chores that are appropriate for each developmental age, their benefits, how to help children become more independent with chores and how to reframe the idea of chores to make them a more rewarding and positive experience for all children.

Benefits of Chores:

We wouldn’t be OT’s if we didn’t first talk about chores and how they relate to ‘Activities of Daily Living’ or ADLs. ADLs is a term commonly used by OTs which refers to the meaningful everyday tasks that a person engages in to have a successful life. These include bathing, getting dressed, feeding etc. Instrumental Activities of Daily Living or IADLs, on the other hand, are similar to ADLs, except that these tasks require more complex and higher level skills to complete. Although they may not be essential to basic survival such as eating and bathing, they are still important to have meaningful engagement in the world. Examples of IADLs are: home management, meal preparation, etc. Therefore, teaching children to become more independent with chores sets them up to have meaningful engagement in the real world.

Learning how to do age-appropriate chores not only helps to foster independence and accountability but also helps children work on many skills such as their fine, gross and visual motor skills, bilateral coordination, language development, sensory input, sustained attention, sequencing, organizational skills and more – all skills they will need to success in the school environment as well.

Now let’s break down the specific skills mentioned above and how they can be acquired by engaging in chores (you may also find the italicized words in our glossary section):

• Sensory Input  – Doing chores can provide a lot of sensory input especially for children who seek movement, touch, visual stimulation and even auditory stimulation (ex listen to the sound of a spray bottle squirting water or the rag wiping left to right). One sensory input, in particular, that is enjoyable to children who either seek and/or avoid sensory stimulation is called proprioception – and a type of proprioceptive input that can be achieved through chores is categorized as ‘heavy work activities’. Heavy work provides a calming and organizing effect on a child’s body when they receive deep pressure in their joints by carrying, lifting, pulling and/or pushing items. This can be achieved by carrying a laundry basket filled with clothes, vacuuming, and even putting groceries away.
• Gross motor skills: Lifting, transferring and coordinating the body to complete chores works on strengthening a lot of the larger muscles of the body.
• Bilateral Coordination – Using both hands to lift, manipulate and transfer items allows both sides of the body to work in a coordinated and organized manner.
• Fine motor skills: Many chores work on strengthening the finer muscles of the hands which is especially important for handwriting. Examples include pressing down on a spray bottle, wiping spills, hanging laundry with clothespin, etc.
• Visual motor skills: Seeing where the “mess” is and coordinating body movements to clean up the mess allows the eyes and body to work together, a skill that is essential for tasks like cutting.
• Tactile input/ tactile desensitization: Many household cleaning materials such as rags, mops, dusters come with various textures. Encourage your child to explore and become more normalized with touching different textures to prevent tactile sensitivities.
• Attention and Sequencing: By completing chores, children have to visually attend to the task until it’s complete and follow a sequence of steps. This helps work on increasing their attention span and sequencing skills.
• Language: Encourage your child to learn the names of various cleaning items, practice identifying the properties of the objects, practice social skills of turn taking and following directions. 

Chores by Developmental Age

Before I talk about ways to help children become more independent with chores and have a positive outlook on these tasks – here is a list of chores that are appropriate for your child based on their developmental age:

Helping Children Become More Independent with Chores:

• It is important that chores are developmentally appropriate for your child’s age (see chart above) for safety purposes and also for the just-right-challenge (a task that is not too difficult but challenging enough to promote learning).
• Children can do chores long before they can talk about it. Since children learn by first seeing, modeling how to complete the chore is important when demonstrating how to safely use the equipment and coordinate the body movements.
• There are different types of supports or cues to provide your child (ie physical, verbal, visual, etc). When providing physical support, place your hand under or over the child’s hand to guide them through the action of completing the chore. When providing visual cues you can place a sticker on the part of the broom stick, for example, where your child’s hand should be placed and/or mark the spot on the floor where they should collect the scraps of paper on the floor with their broom. Verbal cues can be given as well (ex: “Use both hands to hold the broom, move in a side to side motion etc). Gradually diminish any and all cues provided as your child learns to become more independent with the given task.
• Remember to not teach them these skills when in a rush. Practice takes time.
• Understand that there may be a cultural component to completing chores.

Making Chores More Pleasurable:

Many children view chores as a undesirable and time wasting task. Here are ways to change that perspective:

• Consider describing and engaging in chores with the “growth mindset”. In other words, children should perceive difficult tasks as something beneficial and important to their wellbeing. For example, instead of thinking “ugh, I have to clean up my room” – think “I deserve to have a clean room so I can be safe and find everything I need.”
• Consider framing chores as a way in which you are doing your job to help the family versus a punishment when doing something wrong.
• As an adult and model figure for your child, always check to make sure your own views and statements on chores are seen in a positive light. For instance, while washing the dishes, if you appear upset or bothered, this portrays the idea of washing dishes as something dreadful. However, if you verbalize in front of your child how great it feels to have clean dishes for the family, they will view this task as something important to keep the household functioning.

Playing with Cleaning Toy Sets:

Cleaning toy sets are a great way for children to associate cleaning with joy. It is also a great opportunity for parents to work on many skills required to help your child become more independent with certain tasks. Check out our Toy Review tab for recommended ways to play with a dust set:

Some examples of ways to engage with dust sets are:

• Tell your child the names of each of the objects, what they do, and on what surfaces do you use each item.
• Demonstrate their use with the toys and show them with your adult version of each item.
• Go over the properties of each item- the bristles on the dust pan broom are scratchy, the fabric on the duster is soft. What colors do you see? The mop is blue and white, the broom has green bristles. The green broom is long or tall, the red dust pan broom is short or small.
• Compare the properties of their toys and your real life items. Daddy’s mop is tall and it is red and white. Versus their mop is short, and blue and white.
• When going over the names, properties, and use of each item, if your child does not have the verbal vocabulary to participate, encourage them to point.
• Encourage your child to use the objects during play. Do they have a play kitchen, a play house? While making a fake meal in their play kitchen, pretend that they made a mess and have them use the toys to clean it up. “Aww man, I dropped crumbs on the floor, can you grab the broom and help me sweep them up?” “Woops, we spilled some milk on the floor, can you grab the mop and help me clean it up?”
• When your child makes a non food related mess, see if they can use these toys to help you clean it up. Making a valentines day card at the table with tissue paper, or cutting paper? If scraps fall on the floor, encourage them to get their broom and dust pan to clean it up. 
• Encourage the child to put each one of the items back on the stand. This helps them to learn how to clean up their toys and stay organized.
• Encourage your child to teach their siblings, friends, or relatives how to use the items.

Find the complete list in our Toy Reviews tab. And of course, always reach out for comments, questions and/or suggestions for future blog posts and toy reviews. See you in our next post!

Note: Affiliate links were used in this post. I recommend products that I have personally found to be effective. I may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you if you use any of my affiliate links which will be used to maintain this site. Full disclosure policy here.

When it comes to remote learning or home schooling, your child may have a hard time focusing and feeling calm when their environment is perceived to be overstimulating for them. In other words, their brain is perceiving the sights, sounds, smells, tastes and textures in their environment as way more stimulating than they may actually be. To understand how that may feel, imagine trying to focus on a new skill while hearing a constant screeching sound of nails on a blackboard or trying to read with bright florescent lights being flashed in your eyes. Similarly, our kids with sensory processing issues may be having a hard time focusing when their environment is not made comfortable for them.

For our sensory avoiding children who are constantly over-responding to sensory stimuli, it is important to decrease or remove feasible sensory stimulation from their working environment to create a more calming atmosphere for them to learn in. Below are some ways you can do just that.

Quiet Area:

Be mindful of the sounds in the house especially when your child is engaging in their school-work. Sometimes it may be something as simple as closing a window or quieting a sibling that will prevent your child from feeling overstimulated with sounds. Avoid having your child work in high traffic areas of the house where family members are constantly walking in and out of. Turn off the TV and/or all other visible screens. Have other siblings engage in a quiet activity while your child is completing his work.

Noise Reducing Headphones:

If you find that your child is still distracted by noise in the room despite your efforts of quieting the room or that they are quick to cover their ears over sounds that may not be avoidable, have your child wear noise reducing headphones to block out irrelevant sounds. These headphones will still allow your child to hear the main voice in the room such as the parent giving instructions. You can also look into these headphones with an audio connection to a laptop if your child is tuning in to his remote school lesson.

Laptop Settings:

When your child logs onto their remote lesson, be mindful of all the sensory stimulation that comes along with that. Decrease the brightness of the screen if your child is sensitive to bright lights. You can also switch to night-mode on the laptop (available on both Macs and Windows computers), use an anti-glare screen filter for the screen or even have your child wear anti-glare glasses. Be sure to place the laptop in an area of the room where there are no lights directly facing the screen to avoid a glare. In addition to adjusting the glare and brightness of the laptop screen, adjust the volume as well so that it is not too loud for your child. Kindly request students to mute their volume if they haven’t done so already while the teacher is speaking to the class. Lastly, make sure that your child is viewing his screen in the ‘active speaker view’ and not the ‘gallery view grid’. This will ensure that he sees only the person talking and not have all his peers displayed on one page, which can be visually overstimulating.

Sound Machine:

A sound machine that can provide calming sounds such as water and ocean waves is always great. But always see what sounds your child reacts positively towards. A sound machine also muffles excessive background noise and can mitigate the impact of sudden loud sounds which may otherwise startle a sensory avoiding child.

Dimming/Turning off Lights:

In between lessons or when your child is starting to feel overstimulated, you can dim or turn off the lights to give your child a break from the visual stimulation.

Reduce Visual Distractions:

Avoid setting up your child’s workspace by a decorated wall or a wall with too many picture frames, colors and/or patterns. Sitting by a bare-wall with neutral colors is encouraged. Having your child’s workspace by a window can also welcome a lot of distracting sounds and visuals, which may impede in their ability to sustain focus and engagement during their remote lesson. Set up desk dividers if your child is sharing the workspace with a sibling. Also, try to limit visual distractions on your child’s workbooks by covering up the page to only show the math problem he or she is working on. When your child is writing, you can block out excess lines on the page to only display the line your child is writing on by folding the paper or covering the other lines with a dark colored paper or folder (to provide contrast).

Calm Down Area:

If you find that your child is feeling really anxious or overstimulated, you can create an area in the house for them to ‘calm down’. Whether it is inside a tent placed in the corner of their room or underneath a table, creating a space to help your child return to baseline before returning to their remote lesson is important. Inside the ‘calm down’ area, you can have calming music/sounds, as well as calming toys such as glitter wands, a water tube, or even textured toys that they prefer.  

Mindfulness and Deep Breathing Activities:

Mindfulness activities are a great way to help your overstimulated child calm down during times of high anxiety. Helping them focus their energy on one particular area of the body or one particular area in the room, naming/observing various sensations around them (what they see, smell, feel, taste, etc) or engaging in deep breathing exercises are just a few of many ways mindfulness activities can redirect your child to a more calm state. Check out this book for more mindfulness activities to try with your child that are playful and easy to do. If your child is having a hard time engaging in deep breathing exercises during times of high anxiety, you can try to get them to take deep breaths by blowing up a balloon, blowing at a pinwheel, blowing a party blower noisemaker or even pretending to be a dragon.

Hope this post was helpful. Please share any tips or suggestions in the comment box for more strategies that work for sensory avoiding children. And of course, reach out to me if you have any questions or suggestions for future blog posts. See you in my next post!

For parents who are home-schooling their children or have temporarily switched to remote learning, it may not always be easy to support a child at home who has sensory needs. A child with sensory needs or a sensory processing disorder (SPD), may perceive the sensory environment (the sights, sounds, tastes, textures and smells around them) slightly different – either their brain overresponds to information coming from their sensory environment or it under-responds.

For example, if you swing a child whose brain is over-responding to incoming sensory stimuli, they may become afraid, seal their eyes shut or maybe even start crying. That is because their brain is interpreting the motion of swinging as too much stimulation. On the flip side, a child whose brain is under-responding to incoming sensory stimuli, may keep telling you to “swing me higher”, since their brain requires a lot more sensory input to perceive the sensation of movement.

When a child with SPD feels that their external environment does not meet their sensory needs, they will naturally seek out sensory experiences or on the contrary, avoid certain sensory experiences. By implementing sensory strategies in your home, you can help your child feel more calm and ready to learn by increasing or decreasing external sensory stimuli according to your child’s specific needs.

Since this is a detailed topic, I will be separating this post into two blog posts: one for sensory seekers and the other for sensory avoiders. The focus of this post will be for sensory seekers.

Sensory Seekers

Sensory seekers are our kids who may be under-responsive to sensory stimuli and hence seek out stronger sensory experiences. These children may prefer a lot of movement (vestibular input), deep/firm touch (proprioceptive input), various textures (tactile input) as well as various smells, sights and tastes. Keep in mind, a child who is sensory seeking, may not seek out all the above sensations. Every child has their own unique preferences so always cater to your child’s own sensory needs.

Sensory Strategies Before Starting their Lesson

If you find that your child has a hard time initiating their work or is struggling to stay in their seat, you can start off with a 5-10 minute sensory activity or exercise before initiating their schoolwork. Below are some sensory activities to engage in before initiating a lesson or in between lessons when your child starts to lose focus or is struggling to remain engaged.

Self-squeezes: Helping your child provide his or her own self with deep sensory input is helpful when they may not have other sensory items around. For example, you can have them squeeze their palms together, their fingertips together or even press their thumb into the palm of the opposite hand while moving it in a circular motion. You can also have them use the palms of their hands to give their arms firm squeezes.

Image Credit: sensory-processing.middletownautism.com

Animals walks: Engaging in animal walks is a great way for your child to feel deep pressure in their muscles, joints and ligaments without you having to spend a dime. Bear walks, crab crawls and slithering like a snake are all ways to feel pressure in the body. Turn it into a game and guess what animal your child is pretending to be!

Wheelbarrow walking: The kids’ favorite!

Wall push-ups: Wall push-ups are great because they can be done literally anywhere where there is a wall. Playfully tell your child to ‘push the wall but don’t tear it down!’ to encourage them to apply more pressure with their hands/arms and hence receive greater sensory input in their joints.

Chair Push-Ups: As your child is seated on a chair, have them place their hands (palms face down) underneath their thighs and tell them to push themselves up. ‘Let’s see how strong you are!’ Have your child hold the position for 3-5 seconds and then slowly lower themselves back down into the chair. Try this 5 times.

Jumping Jacks : An all-time favorite!

Heavy Work: Having your child carry and transfer heavier objects in the house is a great way for their joints and muscles to receive input. You can make it functional by having them carry their laundry basket (filled with clothes, of course) to the washing machine, carry groceries to and from the car or even carry dishes to the dining table. Pushing and pulling heavy objects is another great and easy way for your child with SPD to feel input in their joints. Have them push/pull tables, chairs or even a heavy door.

Body sock:  A sensory seeking child may also enjoy wearing a body sock which provides deep pressure throughout the joints with its resistive stretchy material.

Tunnel:  Having your child crawl through a tunnel is a great way to receive sensory input all throughout the body as they find themselves crawling or slithering their way out. Add more fun by placing a piece of puzzle on one end of the tunnel and have them complete it on the other end.

Trampoline: Jumping on a trampoline whether it is indoors or outdoors is a great way for your child to receive a lot of sensory input. A trampoline provides both movement as they jump as well as tactile feedback when they land and bounce back up.  

Pogo Stick: Another great way for your child to receive both movement and deep pressure is by having him/her jump up and down on a pogo stick. Your child may even engage in this activity indoors when the weather does not permit.  

Theraputty: Theraputty is not just great for hand strengthening but it also provides a lot of sensory input for our sensory seekers. Hide small beads or toys inside the putty and have your child find it. Or have them roll the putty out and make pancakes!

Fidgets:  It may be helpful to keep hand fidgets by your child’s desk for a quick sensory break from their work when need be.

Sensory Strategies to incorporate WHLE they work

Therabands: placing TheraBand around the front legs of your child’s chair enables them to feel constant tactile feedback with their feet/legs while engaging in tabletop activities. For additional input you can wrap a pool noodle over the theraband to allow your child to roll his or her feet over the noodle.  

Sandpaper: Some of our kids with SPD may be pressing down too hard on the paper with their pencil. This may be due to their need for sensory feedback while writing. Putting sandpaper below your child’s writing paper will provide sensory input due to its gritty texture. If this affects writing legibility, try placing a corkboard underneath the writing paper instead.

Weighted pencils: Adding small weights/bolts to your child’s writing utensil is also a great way to help them receive sensory input during writing activities.

Weighted lap pad or a weighted shoulder wrap: These are great strategies to help your child receive deep pressure/input while completing their work at a table or desk. You can even use these in various settings such as when your child is at the dinner table or even in the car.

Alternative Seating for Sensory Seekers: It may not always be easy for our sensory seekers to sit still in their chairs – and they may not always have to. Providing them with sensory input in their chairs will decrease the chances of them getting up to seek out the sensory input themselves. Below are some alternative seating methods to try with your child during their remote sessions. Keep in mind that for some kids, a movement chair may be a source of distraction while for others, it can help them focus. Similar to how many of us pace back and forth while stressed out or in deep thought, our sensory seekers may also require movement to focus and to relieve anxiety. You may have to test out different types of movement chairs before finding the right one for your child.

• Prone Sitting – when your child is engaging in schoolwork or just simply coloring a picture of a fire truck, have them lie on their stomach. This position will improve focus (refer to my blog for more ways to help your child focus during remote learning), while allowing your child to feel deep pressure throughout his/her body.
• Seat Cushion – a seat cushion is great to try first before purchasing a movement chair since it is low cost and portable, meaning you can literally take it anywhere – dining room table, a friend’s house, etc. The seat cushion provides movement in addition to tactile input due to its varying textured surface.
• Wobble stool – many kids prefer to sit on a wobble stool during tabletop activities, helping them receive movement as they work. The stool can also facilitate an upright posture. Supervision may be required for safety.
• Rocking chair – rocking chairs are great during story time and/or reading
• Scoop seat – this is great for floor seating
• Bean Bag – this is great for when your child needs a sensory break or even while they’re reading or listening to a story.

Oral-Sensory Input: Some sensory seeking children seek sensory input in and around their mouths which can be evident by them biting, mouthing, and licking items all the time. Not receiving appropriate oral sensory input may distract your child from focusing on their remote lesson. Below are some ways to provide oral sensory input during your child’s lesson or during his/her sensory breaks:

• Crunchy Snacks: Allowing your child to snack on some crunchy treats such as crackers or pretzels can provide the deep and calming sensory input in their mouths that they seek. But there are a ton of healthy alternatives as well – apples, carrots and celery are all great crunchy snacks for your child to bite into.
• Chewy Snacks: Some kids may even prefer a chewy snack as a means to receive oral sensory input. Gummy worms, sour patches and even dried fruits are all great options.
• Gum: If age appropriate, chewing gum may provide consistent sensory input in your child’s mouth as they work.
• Sipping through straw: When pausing from his/her schoolwork to take a sip of water or juice, have your child use a straw instead to promote more sensory feedback. Resistive sucking can provide a calming oral sensory experience.
• Chew Toys: You can keep chew toys or chew items at hand as your child engages in their remote lesson, allowing them to chew on his/her item when need be. This chew toy can be worn as a necklace or used as a pencil topper, depending on your child’s preferences. Similar to how many of us bite our pencils while thinking or while completing a crossword puzzle, a chew item may help your child focus and even calm down if they become anxious during their lesson.  

If you have any questions on specific sensory strategies to implement with your child at home or suggestions on what works with your child, leave it in the comment box below. I will be sure to respond!

See you in my next post!

Hosted a virtual talk on 3/11/21 for MUHSEN – a non profit organization aimed to help children and adults with disabilities find inclusiveness and accessibility in their communities. Truly honored and excited to be a part of their work.

Hosted a virtual talk on 3/11/21 for MUHSEN – a non profit organization aimed to help children and adults with disabilities find inclusiveness and accessibility in their communities. Truly honored and excited to be a part of their work.